Towards a Brighter Future
by Tiian
Summary: [DISCONTINUED AT LEAST FOR NOW]AU after b56 An unpleasant Christmas Holiday changes the course of Hermione's life. Warning: Rape in the ch.00SS
1. Chapter 00 : Prologue

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter in any way. Please hail Joanne Kathleen Rowling!  
  
Summary: An unpleasant Christmas Holiday changes the course of Hermione's life. (SS&HG)  
  
Author: Tiian  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
WARNING!   
  
A short rape-scene. Nothing graphic.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Towards a Brighter Future  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Chapter 00:  
  
Prologue:  
  
Pain comes with the light  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
It was dark. And cold.  
  
The cool air caressed her naked skin and her nipples tightened uncomfortably. She was cold and pained. Her wrists were close to bleeding. Her lips still stung from brutal kisses. Her breasts ached. But the main source of her discomfort was between her thighs.  
  
She knew she must look terrible. At least that was what she felt.  
  
Stained. Impure.  
  
Helpless.  
  
She had cried already enough during the past two days and her eyes were sore. Not that she wanted to keep them open, she had already seen enough or perhaps too much. Now there was nothing to see. The darkness covered all and she was happy about it. The light meant pain. It meant suffering once more.  
  
Humiliation.  
  
She was a Gryffindor. Her brave heart had placed her there and she was very happy about it. She had wished to be selected to Gryffindor almost immediately after she had learned of the houses. Ravenclaw had been on second place because of her endless yearning for knowledge. Her courage had assured the Sorting Hat that Gryffindor was for her and she had always taken pride in her house. Always.  
  
Before she had bathed in her self-pity and pain, closing herself from the world. But then her foolish Gryffindor pride had pulled her out of the dark waters. She was a Gryffindor, friend of Harry Potter and the most intelligent student in Hogwarts, no matter what a certain Potions master thought. There was no way she would just lay back and accept her fate. She would fight herself out of this mess.  
  
Those thoughts gave her strength when everything else failed.  
  
The light of torches invaded the room as the door opened. She could see the light even from behind her closed lids. She was tired and weary but still forced herself to raise her chin and look at the man.  
  
She knew that soon she would once again be stained, used to satisfy brutal lust. She had often wondered, why her? She was a muggle-born witch. A mudblood. Why her when status was so important to him? Why her when he obviously disliked her kind?  
  
His steps echoed in the stone room as he stepped closer. She could see him clearly now as he sat on the red satin sheets.  
  
She stared at him as his hand cupped her breast and the lust shone from his eyes. He didn't meet her eyes, his were too busy stocking information and images of her body. His hand was almost lazy as he moved it across her skin.  
  
It was a cold hand fitting for the man.  
  
She could not understand why he did not hit her or hurt her more than he had to. He was only brutal when she fought. When she lay silent, he was also calm. Except for his burning lust to satisfy himself using her body.  
  
He pushed her onto her back and started stripping. She chose not to look.  
  
She didn't resist when he moved above her covering her with his large form. Not even when he invaded her. She would need the strength later on.  
  
He pumped into her with frantic speed, seemingly wanting this over as soon as possible. She was happy about it. She almost sighed in relief when he came and it was over. He never took seconds right away. It took hours or almost days before he travelled here again.  
  
He clothed in silence and she lay where he had pushed her. He left with his cloak flapping behind him.  
  
She had already noticed before that the door was locked with a simple lock. All she had to do was to get rid off the bonds that bind her to the huge bed and find something to pick the lock with. Then she would get away from this place, one way or another.  
  
He would fail to break her.   
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Hermione Granger sat up in her bed. Her heart was pounding fast and her breathing was ragged and almost pained.  
  
"Not again..." she mourned silently, carefully avoiding waking her roommates. It was still dark in the bedroom and she was happy about it. Nothing bad happened in the dark, it was the light she had to look out for. It was then that the pain came...  
  
She had learned to hate sunrise and love dusk.  
  
The dreams she still often had were a very clear remainder of her past that was not so far away. And also a remainder of what had been left behind.  
  
She had not dared to open her mouth and tell others what had happened. It would change nothing and would only serve to make them worried, angry and perhaps a bit uneasy in her company. So she stayed quiet. Not a word of what had happened left her lips to reach ears.  
  
And so no one knew.  
  
She hid herself behind books and sleep. She was not openly avoiding them, she just made sure that her hands were filled with work every time they asked something of her. Visits to Hogsmeade were definitely out of bounds for her now and so she had to come up with more and more interesting stories of interesting books and own special projects she wished to discuss with teachers about. She was working harder than ever and so she was often tired.  
  
Her new habit of constant working was not the only thing that left her tired.  
  
The consequence of that time was becoming clearer and clearer.  
  
She had noticed the signs already sometime ago and a smart girl as she was, she could easily count that one plus one was two.  
  
She was pregnant.  
  
Not something she had wanted or dreamed of. She wanted to continue studying and knew what a hard obstacle a child would be. Still, despite the fact that she didn't want the child, despite the situation that had led to this, she could not kill it. Or part with it.  
  
She desperately needed something to live for, some future to look to. She found an answer, the child.   
  
She was now already past four months. The baby had grown and with it her stomach. Earlier, in the fall before the school had started, she had bought a little bit too big robes that were useful now. She could easily hide her growing belly. She didn't eat more than she had used to no matter how hungry she was. It would raise suspicions.  
  
She was glad that there were only two months left of the school before she would graduate. She could hold on till there. She hadn't informed her parents of this for she knew what their reaction would be. And since they would definitely inform the staff about it.  
  
Her mother would accept the child if she could name the father, which she could not. So her mother would be extremely disappointed.  
  
Her father had always stressed the matter of having children only after marriage and she knew that he would be furious.  
  
To be honest, she had no idea what she would do after the graduation. She knew that her parents would be less than pleased should she walk to them with the child. They would be disappointed that she had not had an abortion. They would tell her to give the child away, which she could not do. Her future was the child and she lived only for it.  
  
She sighed and walked to the bathroom. She knew that sleep would be beyond her now that she had already awoken. She took her robes with her and locked the door with a complicated charm she knew her roommates would be unable to break.  
  
She brushed her teeth like her parents had instructed her to. She slipped out of her huge nightdress and dressed in the robes.  
  
She didn't have to worry just yet, her belly was still quite small though one could see a bulge should he know what to look for. She would make sure that no one knew. No one.  
  
She was aware that she should be taking strengthening potions and such, but there was no way she could get her hands on those. The ingredients themselves would blow any cover she would put up and she had no intentions of telling Madam Pomfrey, Professor McGonagall or Headmaster of her current condition.  
  
Snape had the ingredients and he would know how to make the potions, but he was definitely out of picture. He would take pleasure in humiliating her in public like he had done with Lupin when she had still been on third grade. She would be unable to bear all the questions and clever remarks she would be getting. Or the disappointed looks she would be getting from the teachers. Cross out Snape. And Filch. They would be filled with glee along with all Slytherins.  
  
She stepped from the bathroom to find that the sun had risen and the room basked in its light. She didn't like it, darkness and shadows were better. At least then she didn't have to look and see.  
  
The future was quite bleak before her.   
  
End of chapter 00.  
  
Continued in chapter 01. 


	2. Chapter 01 : The Potion

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter in any way. Please hail Joanne Kathleen Rowling!  
  
  
  
Summary: An unpleasant Christmas Holiday changes the course of Hermione's life. (SS&HG)  
  
  
  
Author: Tiian   
  
  
  
Authors note #1: It has been a long time since I have been this inspired to write.  
  
ROTCGirl said that there is a fic called Fractured Triangle that deals with the same subject, rape. I searched and found the fic. I haven't read it before and so I am not going to read it now. All ideas present in this fic are something I myself have thought of. I don't want Fyrie (or Fure) to come and claim that I have copied her(?) idea. For the record the only rape fic I have read is Hinge of Fate and I am not going to follow the same plot in this one.   
  
Hinge of Fate is a great fic though.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Towards a Brighter Future  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Chapter 01:   
  
The potion  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Hermione walked towards the dungeons with Ron and Harry. They were running trough their usual argument about the best players in Quidditch, of course. She had long since learned how to shut her ears off when they even mentioned Quidditch. Now was one of those times and she had other more pressing matters to think about. Mainly her situation, which was always very depressing thing to think about. Still, she had to form a plan for her and the child's future.  
  
She knew she was still in danger since he would not let go of her even though she had stayed quiet. And the mere existence of the baby put her in even more danger should he ever find out about it.   
  
If she stayed at Hogwarts after graduation she would be rather safe, but that would include everyone finding out.  
  
If she left and went home, he would come after her there and her parents would be in danger.  
  
She needed a place for herself, but the problem with that was that she had no money and she could not rely on her parents to help her out. She could almost hear them lecture her and then state that she would have to survive on her own since she had gotten herself into this situation in the first place. Not that she would ever tell them that the child was a result of a rape.  
  
She suppressed a sigh since she knew Ron and Harry would hear it and ask about it. They had been worried about her lately and she didn't want to lie to them any more than she already had.   
  
She heard the change in their tones as they neared the dungeons and the classroom. Double Potions with Slytherin always required extra strength and most importantly, silence.  
  
Why Dumbledore put them together every single year was beyond her. Being from Gryffindor himself, he should know how deep the hate run between Slytherin and Gryffindor houses. Nothing good ever came out of it. At least not for Gryffindor since they were the ones losing points and getting detentions for minor mistakes in Snape's class.  
  
Still she liked Potions. It was a fascinating subject for there was no "foolish wand waving" involved as Snape it put. It differed from Transfiguration and Charms greatly and that was its charm. The art itself. Even though they had Professor Snape as a teacher, she could still find herself enjoying the actual brewing. No matter how frustrating it was that she got no credit for her achievements. They went to Draco Malfoy who was merely sufficient in the art and didn't put himself into studying it like she did.  
  
Ron and Harry finally quieted down as they could see the open door. It was never wise to talk when there was a good possibility that Snape could hear them. He could make anything sound bad and took points for practically no reason at all. His dislike for Harry seemed to have grown greater with every year and they were all glad that this was the last year. He was bad enough already.  
  
She knew that the only reason Harry and Ron still took potions at all was their standing dream of becoming an auror. For that, they needed potions NEWTs. Why Snape had allowed them to continue, was beyond her. He was known to never allow anyone continue if they didn't reach Outstanding from OWLs and she knew their grades. She was quite positive that Dumbledore had had something to say in the matter.  
  
They stepped cautiously into the classroom for they knew that here ruled Slytherin house and their head was worst of all. Or maybe Draco was on the same level even though he lacked the authority and power Snape had.  
  
Severus Snape was already sitting behind his desk and looked at them with annoyed look in his eyes. The black eyes swiftly took in their appearance and found nothing out of place. Ron had once forgotten his cloak and for that he had lost fifteen points from Gryffindor "for open show of disrespect towards the school rules".  
  
Snape turned his eyes back into the paper before him and they sneaked quietly into their places nodding to those Gryffindors who were already seated. Slytherins snickered at their careful attitude. They had nothing to worry about since, if only in this class, they could do nothing wrong.  
  
They were silent all the time till the class filled and Snape closed the door. Should a Gryffindor attempt to come late, it would be from five to twenty points from the house or detention, depending on how mad Snape was. Slytherins could enter with no worries and wide grins.  
  
The black eyes scanned the room and took in every detail before he spoke. "Today you will all brew your potions independently." Hermione supressed her smile. She liked being able to concentrate on her own potion and not having to help others.  
  
"In the end of this class you will all test your own potions." He smirked at the horrified looks on the faces of those uncertain of their skills in the brewing. Even some Slytherins looked slightly worried.  
  
"The potion is quite simple, but requires a good timing. If you are even a minute late in adding a new ingredient, the potion will fail." He continued calmly with his voice filling the silent room.  
  
Hermione nodded to herself. Timing wouldn't be a problem for her, still she hoped that the potion wouldn't be something dangerous. Probably not since Snape would be fired and punished should any one of them suffer serious harm.  
  
"You will brew a potion that works as a pregnancy test." He finally stated.  
  
Hermione stared at Snape and prayed that she had heard wrong. Pregnancy test?   
  
Oh, no!   
  
Her thoughts flew around in her head, but she couldn't really catch any of them.   
  
Pregnancy test?   
  
She was in so much trouble. If she brewed this correctly, she would have to test it and then everyone would know. She would have to fail, no matter how much satisfaction Snape and Slytherins would take of it. The others would wonder as well, but she could just say that someone must have added something in without her noticing. It had happened before, just not to her.  
  
"--but when used on a man, it merely causes them to momentarily act like they would be drunk. That is if it is properly brewed. If made wrong..." He smiled evilly at Harry and Ron. "--the consequences can be much, much worse." The boys looked really worried, since they were on the bottom of the class.  
  
She had been so deep in her thoughts that she had missed a part of what Snape had said. She had never even read about this potion, she had no idea what it was like or what it did. Not more than she had just heard.  
  
"The potion reacts to the extra hormones in a pregnant woman body and for a moment the woman will glow green. One month is one minute, two months is two minutes and so on. A woman who is not pregnant will glow red for about half minute. No harm will be caused to the unborn child." He continued his explanation.  
  
"After the potion has been tested, those successfully brewed will be sent to Madam Pomfrey. This potion is useful only for a year after brewed and then it loses its reliability."  
  
*So you use your students to fill her up every year. Thank you very much!* Hermione swore in her head. If Snape would be a little more diligent and would do this potion himself, she would be free of this new problem.  
  
"You will all take one page from this pile--" He pointed at the corner of his table. "--and after reading it you will pick up and handle the ingredients yourselves. There will be no speaking or asking advices during these two hours. I expect you to work in complete silence." He said the final words staring at Hermione then when she was sure he would say something nasty to her, he suddenly returned to his desk and sat down.  
  
When nothing happened, he raised his eyebrow. "Well, what are you waiting for? Potion not finished by the end of the second hour automatically fails. And I would say that you have only just the time you need."   
  
His words caused a sudden panic in the room as everyone moved at the same time to get themselves notes and ingredients. Snape smirked at the panic filled faces.  
  
Hermione managed to get herself notes and then the ingredients. Unnoticed in the crowd of students she took some extra ingredients to help her in failing the potion. She didn't want to simply make it poor, because she would have to drink it. It would have to be explosive. Failed potion could be bad for the baby, so there would have to be no potion left for her to sample.  
  
She read the note carefully and started chopping the items. In her head she processed all that she knew about potions and what could make it first explode and then evaporate. Snape had no need to glance in her direction to keep her from helping Harry and Ron. She needed all her concentration and time just to help herself.  
  
Finally she settled for a simple potion used often for childish bombs. She had once brewed it for Fred and George when they had been trying to invent new things to sell in their joke shop. It would be rather hard to transform the potion she should be making into it so that it would look like an accident.  
  
No matter how much she disliked Snape, she knew that he was a very smart man and knew more than enough of potions to see through her cover if she would make it possible. The man knew what he taught. She was only sad that he would probably punish her for this rather that congratulate for job well done.   
  
She worked hard for the next one and half an hour before it was time to wait a while before the last item could be added. She like so many others laid back to enjoy the pause. It was still over an hour till dinner, but she was already starving. She had kept her breakfast small as she always had because changing her habits would alert others. If not Harry and Ron, who could be quite thick sometimes, then someone else.  
  
The time flew by too soon in her opinion. Snape was aware that the potions should soon be ready and was staring at the class. More importantly, he was staring at the Gryffindors. One mistake and he would nail them. Unfortunately, Hermione knew she would be the one making the biggest mistake. She had considered different ways of failing the potion and some would indeed cause most misfortunate combinations. But still she doubted that no other potion would blow up and then evaporate.   
  
*So today Harry won't be the one Snape will torture. It will be me.* She thought miserably.   
  
The time ended and slowly she saw as her classmates started one by one adding the final item. Her time would be a little later than theirs and so she hoped that they would be able to finish bottling before her potion would blow up. She didn't want all their potions to fail as well and that they would if some of her potion found its way to their cauldrons.  
  
Hand trembling a little, she dropped the last ingredient. It melted into the potion. She saw as her classmate bottle their potions as hers started to turn into different colours. Black, red, blue and finally ill green. After two minutes, it would blow up.  
  
She moved as far as she could without raising suspicion and opened her bottle. She saw others lining before Snape's desk. Her bottle was tightly shut which was good for her. She really had to fight to get it open and that took time. Soon...  
  
Just as she had managed to open the bottle, her potion exploded. The green liquid showered all over the room staining everything before starting to evaporate. The students jumped and some screamed at the sudden bang. Through the green mist she saw Ron drop his bottle and his potion swirling across the floor.  
  
Snape on the other hand stood up and moved to find out what had happened while shouting that the mist wasn't probably poisonous and that everyone should stay where they are.  
  
Hermione looked around. The mist had cleared to show the ugly grease marks all over the room. She had miscalculated somewhere... There shouldn't have been any marks left. Perhaps whatever Ron had managed to make, had somehow mingled with the mist and caused the grease as a side effect.  
  
"Miss Granger."  
  
She gulped and turned to look at her Potions master. His dark eyes burned and his lips were a thin line. He was tall, much more so than she. His black eyes, hair and clothing made him appear scary and ruthless. He was angry. She could see it in the way he looked at her, in the way he had said her name.  
  
"Would you care to explain why you saw fit to shower us all with... grease?" He sneered. And Hermione found that she could only open her mouth but nothing came out. Just like everyone and everything else in the room, he also was covered in grease. In some other situation she might have found it funny, but not now. Not when he towered above her and stared at her with furious fire in his eyes.  
  
"I am still waiting so start talking. I take no pleasure in watching the insides of your mouth. I am sure that you have the most ... fascinating explanation as to how this happened." He continued and Hermione flushed furiously.  
  
"I do not, sir. I don't know what went wrong." She managed to mutter. She had thought that changing the potion into another one would have been the hardest part, but found it not so. Meeting Snape's black eyes staring at her as if she were some disgusting vermin was hard, much harder than she had thought.   
  
"Oh, is that so? The little annoying know-it-all doesn't actually know it all." He said with a glee and turned to the others. "We have just witnessed a great event. Miss Granger has admitted that she is no better than others. Now you can all thank her for this grease that hangs over all of you."  
  
Then he turned to Hermione. "Twenty points from Gryffindor for this and detention. You will stay here and clean the mess you have caused. Without magic."  
  
She could hear the terrified gasps from her classmates. Twenty points merely because of her. And now Snape would be in so bad mood that everyone that failed, would lose more points than usually.  
  
She sat down in her chair and listened to the sounds. She could feel the mocking glares she received from Slytherins as well as their anger at what she had done. During the testing she heard Snape strip fifteen points from Gryffindor. Luckily, the potion was so easy that most had succeeded in it. The men left the room in a happy drunken state while the women stared at her with different emotions playing on their faces their bodies glowing red. She refused to look at them, but since she hadn't heard any surprised gasps or such, none were probably pregnant.  
  
She didn't open her eyes until she heard the door close. She was now alone with Snape. He stared at her and then spoke. "Come here Miss Granger." She frowned at his calm tone, but did as he said.   
  
"Sit down." He said and pointed at one of the front chairs. He looked at her with a strange look in his eyes, one she had not seen before. At some point he had cleaned himself, but she had not noticed.  
  
"How far along are you?" He asked suddenly and Hermione started.  
  
"Excuse me, sir, but what do you mean?" She said carefully. She didn't want him to know how much his words had scared her. She had thought that he had somehow found out.  
  
Snape gave her a piercing stare. "I asked how far your pregnancy has proceeded?"  
  
Hermione stared at him her thoughts running wild for the second time that day. He couldn't know... He could not!  
  
"I am not pregnant, sir." She stated and was surprised at how calm she sounded. Snape snorted.  
  
"Then you don't mind drinking this." He said and handed her a small vial. And she just knew what was in it. She stared at the bottle, not saying yes or no.  
  
"In my time here, I have often been asked to brew this potion using students so that those hiding their pregnancy would be found. Many desperate women have failed their potions intentionally, which has lead to some very interesting results. Yours is one of the most interesting ones since you decided to make sure that there was no trace left of the potion." He spoke calmly with the same voice he used when teaching.  
  
"This potion is very simple and while it is possible to fail in brewing it, you are too talented for that." He stated. In her surprised state Hermione was hardly able to register that he had just complimented her work. "Also, I already knew that you were the one pregnant and so this was merely a test."  
  
Hermione stared at him. *No way. This can't be happening... Not now. Not him.* She knew that she had no way out. If she drank the potion, he would know. If she refused, he would know. She was trapped and he knew it. She sighed tiredly and pulled her hair from her face. She stared at the floor unable to look at him for the longest of times.  
  
When she finally looked at him she saw a calm face and not a trace of glee or sadistic pleasure. She frowned. This was not the reaction she had expected.  
  
"How far are you?" He asked again. Neither his face nor his voice betrayed any emotions as he spoke.   
  
"Four months." She answered quietly. In a strange way it felt good to finally say it out loud, to admit to someone that she was indeed with a child. She had known it, but because of the circumstances she hadn't been able to state it aloud in the fear that someone might overhear. Now she had done it. She had said it to Snape off all people.  
  
To her surprise he sighed and then rubbed his temples. There was a strange look on his face as he looked at her. "In that case there is nothing more I need to ask since I already know it all." He said almost whispering. He was acting really strange and Hermione frowned.  
  
"Sir?" She said not even knowing what it was that she wanted him to say.  
  
He stood up and told her to follow him. He was taking her to his private storeroom in his office, she noticed. She had been there last time during her second year when she had stolen Bicorn hair and Boomslang skin for the Polyjuice Potion. Not much had changed during the years. The room was still as tidy and organized as it had been five years ago. It had been a huge help then.  
  
Snape walked with his usual graze to one of the big boxes on the floor. He muttered something under his breath and tapped it with his wand. The box sprung open revealing over dozen bottles. He picked up quite a few of them and placed them on the stone floor. Then he took one single page out and put it upon the bottles. With a charm he closed the box and then levitated the potions to his table. He took a bag from his drawer and filled it with the bottles and also added the page with them.  
  
"Here." He handed the bag to amazed Hermione who raised her eyebrow while taking the bag. It was slightly heavier than she had thought it would be.  
  
"In that bag are all the potions you will need to drink during the next month. There is some extra since you have clearly neglected taking them before. The instructions are written on the paper I put there as well. Do as instructed and maybe that tired look will disappear." He explained.  
  
Hermione stared at him with her eyes wide. He was actually going to help her. "Thank you, professor." She muttered and he merely nodded. He then left the room and Hermione followed. She watched carefully as he warded the room and charmed it locked. Luckily, he hadn't had all those up when she had been in her second year. She knew some of the spells he used and none were pleasant.  
  
Then he turned to look at the mess Hermione had made and cleaned it with one wave and few words. He did not clean Hermione, but she was too stunned to react to that pretty insignificant fact. She had greased the whole room and she had already mentally prepared to clean it, but now he had done it before her. She looked at him amazed.  
  
He merely raised an eyebrow. "Yes, Miss Granger?"  
  
"I thought I was to clean this up." She said before she could stop herself. *Foolish girl! Saying something like that to Snape is the same as asking for some awful work!*  
  
"Had my guess been incorrect and you were not pregnant, you would have spent the next hours cleaning this room, but the situation has changed. You will stay here for the same amount of time, but doing your homework. I believe you have some undone." He said the last sentence with a raise of his voice. Hermione nodded.  
  
Again Snape waved his black wand and the delicious scent of food filled the room. "You will eat here and you will eat well. I have seen the amount you normally eat and that is not enough for you now."   
  
"Thank you, professor." Hermione said and realised then that she was actually grateful to Snape. Her Potions teacher who had ridiculed her numerous times in the past, who never gave her the credit she rightfully deserved and who never ever was nice to her. She also realized that he had had his eye on her for some time.  
  
"I will leave now. There is a meeting and I need to report to the Headmaster--"  
  
"NO!" Hermione screamed. "You can't tell him! Not to anyone!"  
  
Snape raised his eyebrow and looked at Hermione mockingly. "--that Miss Granger received detention for blowing up a cauldron and we need to add that to the order of new cauldrons." He finished his sentence with some of his usual sneer. Somehow it made her feel better, this situation more like reality. This was not a dream, this was really happening.  
  
Hermione stared at Snape and could feel her cheeks burning. Still she held her chin high. "Sorry sir. But still, please do not tell anyone. Not even to Professor Dumbledore."  
  
Snape stared at Hermione with the same strange expression as before and then shook his head. "I have no intentions of telling anyone if that is your wish."  
  
"Why?" She said in surprise before she could think twice, but she did not regret asking.   
  
He looked at her for a long time and she began to fidgeting under his firm stare. Then he suddenly spoke. "Because I know." He simply said and Hermione frowned. "Know what?" She asked in confusion.  
  
Snape looked at her with a stern look. "I know how this child came to be and who is its father."  
  
  
  
  
  
End of chapter 01.  
  
  
  
Continued in chapter 02.  
  
  
  
  
  
Authors note #2: Who can guess the father? I think it is pretty obvious even though I have left his name hidden for now. It will be revealed in the next chapter. 


	3. Chapter 02 : I know

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter in any way. Please hail Joanne Kathleen Rowling!  
  
  
  
Summary: An unpleasant Christmas Holiday changes the course of Hermione's life. (SS&HG)  
  
  
  
Author: Tiian   
  
  
  
Authors note:   
  
  
  
I have often thought that Snape doesn't really (in the books) take from 50-100 points for some simple mistake. So I took the points Gryffindor lost down a bit. Now they lose only 35 points when before they lost 120 points.  
  
  
  
Also, since reading OotP I have had to change a few things. I didn't, for one, know/remember that after OWLs it was not necessary to take certain classes and I am positive that Neville won't be continuing Potions. Yep, positive.  
  
It was a lot of work to recreate certain scenes...  
  
  
  
I hate writing big confrontations since I often fail to make them realistic. Hopefully this came out alright. Also, in this chapter I finally ventured to investigate Snape's thoughts. Hopefully he isn't too OOC.  
  
  
  
It seems that many have a good idea of the father. Well, soon you will all know.  
  
  
  
Also, as anon suggested, I put up a rape warning inside the summary. But there was a warning at the beginning of the first chapter (prologue). I guess it wasn't enough for people to notice...   
  
I made it clearer.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Towards a Brighter Future  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Chapter 02:  
  
I know  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"I know how this child came to be and who is its father."  
  
Snape's words rang in her head and she couldn't do anything but stare at him and shake her head. *No. It is impossible. He can't know! He simply cannot! How could he?* She had done everything in her power to keep people from seeing her current condition, she hadn't even hinted that something had happened. Somehow he had still found her out, but surely that didn't mean that he knew everything, right?  
  
She laughed almost bitterly. "No, I don't think you know." How could he? She hadn't said one word to anyone and the man was someone no one would think of since they didn't know of the circumstances. She herself had troubles believing it so how could he of all people know? "It is not Ron or Harry as you probably think."  
  
"I never thought it was either one of them." He answered surely and calmly. And she could see that he spoke the truth. He really didn't think it was either of them. Then who did he think it was? Harry and Ron were the only boys that were close to her. She didn't know if Snape knew that she had once dated Victor Krum, but he had been out of picture for a long time.  
  
"Then who do you think it was?" She bit out angrily. This had been a very tiring day for her and she could no longer control her anger. So what if he was her teacher? She couldn't care less. Normally she would have lost house points for arrogance, but now they didn't really matter. Not to her and obviously not him either since he didn't take any.  
  
"Lucius Malfoy." He said without any feelings in his voice. His eyes bore into hers and Hermione's breath caught in her throat. The intensity of his stare told her that he knew for certain. *No... How?* Her eyes widened with terror.  
  
"I see I was correct." Snape said almost sadly. He turned to organize some papers that lay on his desk and so gave Hermione time to get a hold of herself.  
  
Her most guarded secret. He knew. He really knew, everything. She tried to calm her heart and her breathing. She was taking in too much oxygen and was beginning to feel faint. She had to get a hold of herself, gain some control. She was not used to this since she hardly ever lost it. She was always able to process information calmly and effectively, but now everything had grumbled down. Taking deep calming breath she spoke.  
  
"How...?" Her whisper was so quietly that he hardly heard her.  
  
Still keeping his eyes fixed on the papers, he answered. "Dark Lord and his followers don't trust me anymore so I cannot get hold of insider information, but that doesn't mean that I couldn't find out anything. While spying on Malfoy at the end of the Christmas vacation I happened to hear Lucius complain to Macnair about a loss of a ... toy he had captured to keep him entertained now that his wife is dead."  
  
"Toy...?" Hermione spit out and then started to laugh bitterly. "I was a toy?!" She shrieked and could feel long suppressed tears trailing down her cheeks. On some level she had known, but now that he simply slapped her with the knowledge, she felt more humiliated than ever before.  
  
"To Lucius Malfoy all those below him are. Muggles, muggle-borns, squibs and people like Mr. Longbottom are something to toy with. He has no respect for those he thinks are below him. Sometimes not even for those above him. Head master is a good example of that." Snape explained before turning to look at Hermione. She wanted to turn away, but his black eyes held her still.  
  
"It didn't take me long to understand that the girl he was talking about was you. A mudblood witch who humiliates his son with her grades and who happens to be a good way to get to Potter." He continued and no matter how much Hermione wanted to close her ears, she knew she had to hear this, had to listen. No matter how painful it was, no matter how humiliating.  
  
"You were a toy to satisfy his needs and a knife they would place on the throat of Potter and Dumbledore for the Dark Lord. He has probably heard from his son that practically every teacher here worships the ground you walk on. That and your friendship with Mr. Potter made you a very useful tool. Also I believe that the fact that you are muggle-born and still reach out to be the best student at Hogwarts had something to do with why he chose you."   
  
Hermione almost whimpered. The pain was greater than ever since she had left the dungeons. She had tried to block what had happened from her mind and forget it. Now he had brought it all up again and for the first time she was forced to really think what had happened. She had wondered why he had chosen her and now she knew, he threw it to her face. She had made guesses of course, but this was certain information.  
  
Her desperation, anger, frustration, helplessness, pain and, all in all, her bottled emotions exploded like her potion before. She hadn't allowed herself to express any of the emotions and had lived through the past months in unstable balance. She had avoided actually thinking and feeling what had happened. Now she knew she finally had to. She hated Snape for forcing her to go through this and at the same time thanked him for doing so. She needed this.  
  
She needed to cry and now she finally could.  
  
She had cried when she had been captured, but never after it. She had firmly refused to since she knew she would break down if she did and would babble all her secrets to who ever would be listening. Now she was in the presence of a person who already knew it all and she could express her pain freely.   
  
Her floodgate opened and for the first after her escape she allowed her emotions to run wild. She sat down to the cold floor and curled up into a ball. The fact that she was wailing in the presence of Severus Snape didn't bother her in the least. Not now...  
  
In her state of mind she didn't notice that Snape cast a simple warming spell to the floor. She also missed the pained look that flashed across his face before it settled back to calm.  
  
After some time she could finally settle down and her wailing quieted down to hiccups. She almost wiped her face to her robes before she noticed that Snape had crouched before her and was offering her a handkerchief. She took it with a thanking smile on her face and he nodded. She wiped her tears away and giggled a little.  
  
"I must look terrible." She said with an honest smile on her face. It felt good to smile again easily. The pain had somehow subdued and a weight lifted from her shoulders.  
  
Snape looked at her and then nodded. "True."  
  
She puffed. "Why thank you!"  
  
"Pleasure." He answered with a small smile and Hermione found her lips curving up. The man was impossible! But somehow the fact made her feel better. She slowly rose to her feet and tenderly placed her hand on her stomach.  
  
"Finally... I truly understand." She said slowly with a small sad smile. "Thank you."  
  
Snape only nodded. "Eat now and then do your homework. I will be back around time you should be finished to release you from your "detention". If you have questions, ask them then." Then he turned and left with his robes swirling. The door closed with a bang and she was alone.  
  
She had avoided being alone for a long time now, since that was when she was most vulnerable. She had failed to protect herself already once and had no doubts that should Lucius come to Hogwarts and find her alone, she would be captured again. She was only glad that it was not safe for him here anymore. Or anywhere in the matter of fact. But why not use Draco then? Or some other future Death Eaters?  
  
One of the reasons she had not stepped forward was that it would not help anything. Malfoy was a known Death Eater, had been since the end of her fifth year. He was already sentenced to a prison. Not to Azkaban since that was now under Voldermort's control. That was how he had gotten out.  
  
Lucius Malfoy had been sentenced to Azkaban after the battle in the Department of Mysteries years back. He had not stayed there long before Voldemort had free him and the others.  
  
She hoped that a day when Lucius Malfoy would have to pay for what he had done to her and what he had done to other people as well. She knew that Death Eaters did horrible things. She had read about them, heard about them and finally experienced them herself. Lucius had shown her what he was capable of, not that she had ever doubted him. After all, he had given Ginny the diary of Tom Riddle and caused all the horrors during her second year. She herself had lost a long time of her life having been petrified. Luckily, no one had died. Lucius had never had to answer for that crime either.  
  
With a start she realized that she was thinking about the father of her baby.  
  
Hopefully his evilness was not genetic and so inheritable feature. Draco was so like his father that it almost scared her. Still, Draco lacked the power his father had. Power, grace and dignity were a inseparable part of Lucius Malfoy. Unfortunately so was his cruelty and lust for even higher power.  
  
Hopefully her child, no THEIR child, would gain some Gryffindor features from her to balance the Slytherin in Lucius.   
  
She sat down on near by chair and rubbed her belly. She had often seen pregnant women rubbing their bellies, but had never understood why. Now the same instinct made her act.  
  
She had wondered if the baby was a girl or a boy many times. She knew that there were spells to find out, but she didn't want to know. Not yet. And besides if she had started to show unexpected interest in books that told about expecting and babies, Ron and Harry would have caught onto her. If not them, then it would have been the librarian, Madam Pinch. She had sharper eyes than most people and she would most definitely tell at least to Dumbledore. No matter how much she respected the Headmaster, she didn't want him to know. It was strange, but somehow she felt better that the one who knew was Snape and not Dumbledore. Something she wouldn't have thought of before now. Perhaps... it was easier to look at Snape and know that he knew than look at Headmaster watching her with stern look. He was a person she didn't want to disappoint.  
  
What was really strange, was that she actually trusted Snape to keep his mouth shut. She trusted him not to tell anyone. He had been horrible to her all of her school years. He had humiliated her, ignored her, disrespected her and simply been awful until now. Her pregnancy was something he could have used to really hurt her and have fun with, but instead she found herself facing a whole new Snape. One that was not a complete bastard.  
  
She didn't know what made him act like this, reveal another side of him to her. Was it because of Lucius Malfoy? He was a former Death Eater and knew fully well what was done to female captives. He knew what she had went trough, did he pity her?  
  
No, there hadn't been a trace of pity in him. She was glad about that. She didn't want people to pity her and perhaps he understood this. She knew he had gone trough a lot since Voldemort had risen again. He had tried to go back to spy, but he had failed in her sixth year. He had been barely alive when he had been found at the Burrow. Not able to return to Hogwarts because that was what was expected, he had went to Weasleys where Molly had kept him alive. Then with her husband and oldest sons, Bill and Charlie, she had brought him back to Hogwarts for Madam Pomfrey to look after. It must have been hard for him to rely on others.  
  
She hadn't seen him, but the grave look on Headmaster's face had told her enough. Snape had survived and then returned to his normal duties. She knew that he still spied for their cause, but she also knew that it was dangerous for him to leave the safety of Hogwarts for even simple matters. He was on Voldemort's hit-list after all.  
  
But he had left and his knowledge was based on those visits outside Hogwarts. How he had managed to spy on Lucius and Macnair without being seen, she did not know and didn't care to guess. It was not important for her to know and it might be even dangerous for him. The less she knew the better, the safer he was. Odd that she should worry about his safety.  
  
He had told her that if she had questions, she could ask. But what was there to ask about? She didn't need to know more about how he had known and he had already told her why she had been selected. She knew she could ask why people do things like this, but she also knew that the answer would be different for all since people were unique.  
  
She sighed and pulled herself up again. Her stomach grumbled as a remainder that she was hungry. She had already almost forgotten it. On his desk was a plate filled with rice, chicken and different side dishes. There was cup beside the plate filled with sauce. A can of pumpkin juice to help it all down was also on the desk with a glass keeping it closed. Fork was on the left side of the plate while knife was on the right side. Everything was organized nicely.   
  
She pulled the chair and sat down. She was almost drooling already and she forced herself to eat calmly. In the end, for the first time in a month, she was full and felt like stuffed animal.  
  
She then pulled out her books at her own desk and started doing her homework as Snape had instructed her to. She didn't have all her books with her and so she had only limited amount of work to be done. After finishing them she started cleaning herself. She had already forgotten what had happened before, but was reminded as she touched her hair. She knew that she would have to wash her hair with conditioner multiple times before she would get a hairbrush through it.  
  
She knew few spells that could help, but preferred to do this on her own, without magic. She knew that after this "detention" she should be tired, not so clean and her hands should be in an awful shape. She was a bit of a perfectionist and wanted to look like she had hours of work behind her. She would ask Snape if he knew any way she could make her hands look realistic.  
  
The stress, tears and food were beginning to wear her down and since she had already done all she could, she could see any harm in getting a nap. After all, Snape wouldn't return for another hour. She could easily close her eyes for a moment...  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Severus Snape walked to the dungeons with his robes billowing. He gave hard stares to all students that he walked by, most covered back in fear. It was satisfactory to see that he had managed to install some fear into them, it made classes considerably easier to handle. Especially since Dumbledore insisted on keeping Gryffindors and Slytherins in the same class. He had to do everything in his power to made sure that no student was harmed in any way, well not permanently anyway. Accidents still happened, some intended.  
  
He had tried to talk to the Headmaster, but had been ignored. Dumbledore could be annoying.  
  
He approached the classroom with a strange mixture of feelings. He knew she had gone through a terrible ordeal and it was a miracle that she was still alive. What kind of miracle, he didn't know. He just knew that somehow on her own, she had managed to escape.  
  
And after that she had stayed silent. Not a word of complaint, anger, sadness. Nothing.  
  
She had hid herself behind a mask and studying. NEWTs were important, but he knew she had started preparing for them already during her first year. Perhaps not knowing it herself. She had escaped from the pain and memory, which was understandable but not recommendable.  
  
Since he had had his guesses, he had kept a closer eye on her than others. He had noticed her tired expressions, longing looks towards food and few occasional times she had laid her hand on her stomach. He was no fool and could see what she tried to hide.  
  
She was with a child.   
  
He had cursed when he had realized it.  
  
He had pondered whether or not he should approach her or not and decided to wait and see what she would do. When she had done nothing, he had been forced to act. She clearly wanted to keep her state a secret, but he had already noticed Minerva looking at her worriedly. And no wonder. Her tiredness was clear to everyone with eyes.  
  
Still he had had to wait until they reached the class about the pregnancy potion. He hadn't lied at all when he had taught them. He did the same every year and so none of the teachers could see that he did it on purpose. He had hoped that she would have been smart enough to just spoil the potion, but no. She had had to turn it into to a bomb. Soon the entire school would have heard about it and she would be a tough spot.  
  
Not that she knew, but he had already saved her once. During the meeting when he had told about the detention and the cauldron, her clumsiness had caused many guesses. He had covered for her saying that someone must had intentionally spoiled her potion. He had received scolding from McGonagall about not having watched them carefully enough. He had endured it and in the end suggested, once again, to Dumbledore that he would not put Gryffindor and Slytherin together next year. Dumbledore's eyes had twinkled all the time and he had hummed under his breath. Snape could swear that he put those to houses together only to annoy him.  
  
Of course he understood that Gryffindor was probably the only house capable of holding their ground when facing Slytherin.   
  
Hufflepuff would be a disaster since they were far too good hearted. Every single Slytherin would look down on them and use them mercilessly for their own games.  
  
Rawenclaws would easily make all Slytherins look bad since their grades were so much better and that would cause some serious problems. Envious Slytherins were perhaps the worst.   
  
The dungeons were pretty much deserted as always when there were no classes. Some Slytherins wondered there, but otherwise people knew to stay far from there. He was not a tolerant man and the students had learned that. Even Slytherins were wary of him. They knew better than to disappoint their Head of house.   
  
He thought he saw a flash of red hair around one corner and frowned. Obviously Granger's friends were loyal sort. There were no longer many redheads at Hogwarts, only one Mr Weasley and one Miss Weasley. At one time he had thought that they would never end.  
  
Him being here meant that they were waiting for Granger. He had no doubts that Potter would be there as well. At least her friends cared about her even if they were clueless as hell. He didn't think she had told them or they would have already left to get revenge for her.  
  
He opened the door to the classroom and shut tight behind him. As he raised his eyes, he saw Hermione sleeping on her desk. She must have been really tired to fall asleep on her desk in cold dungeons. He murmured few silencing spell making sure that they wouldn't be heard.  
  
He purposely made some extra sounds and they woke her up. She looked panicked for a moment, then after seeing him seemed to calm down. She yawned widely and stretched. Some of her papers fell to the floor and she leaned down to pick them up.  
  
In the mean while Snape walked to place the papers Dumbledore had given him onto the table. Then he turned to her and walked to sit on one of the chairs so that they could talk.  
  
"Do you have questions?" He asked when she didn't seem to be willing to break the silence.  
  
She shook her head. "No."  
  
Snape nodded while a little surprised. He had expected her to ask about his ways of spying among other things. It was strange to hear that Miss Granger, who seemed to absorb knowledge like water, had no questions. Well, it was perhaps only better that way. "I have one for you."  
  
Hermione blinked. "For me?" She asked.  
  
Snape nodded. "How did you manage to escape?"   
  
He had wondered about it for some time already. He knew that manor she had been kept was a huge place with many unexpected turns that were intended to confuse the quest.  
  
She seemed to hesitate slightly before she answered. "He... miscalculated. I lived eleven years as a muggle, which he does not understand. He thought that without a wand I would be helpless and didn't bother to ward the room, just locked it. I managed to wriggle my hands from the bonds though it was painful, and then I picked the lock."  
  
Snape raised one of his eyebrows and then, to Hermione's surprise, grinned. It was not a nice smile, but one he had often directed at Harry and filled with unholy glee. "That must have been what angered him so." He said with satisfaction.  
  
"What?" Hermione asked totally clueless of what he was talking about.  
  
He looked at her and then shook his head. "Nothing. Your "detention" is over. You are free to leave. I believe your friends are waiting for you." He said as he stood up and walked to his table.  
  
A surprised look passed over her face before it turned into a smile. She hurriedly collected her things and shut her bag. Then she walked to him to see him grading papers.  
  
"Umm... Sir, I were wondering..."   
  
Snape raised his head from the papers. "Yes, Miss Granger?"  
  
"Shouldn't we make sure that I look like someone who has been working all this time?" She said and held out her hands. As he looked, he saw that they were clearly not hands of someone who had just cleaned an entire classroom, without magic.   
  
He found himself almost smiling. *Perfectionist.*  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
End of chapter 02.  
  
  
  
Continued in chapter 03.  
  
  
  
  
  
Author note:   
  
I have read fics were Hermione has been viewed as a vegetarian. Does this have bases in the books?  
  
And it seems that people caught on faster than I thought. Almost all guessed Lucius.   
  
SO why him?   
  
He's an evil bastards filled with confidence. I just love the man. And he is rather good-looking, I mean Jason Isaacs is. That long blond hair... ^^   
  
Also, I hate the way most people view him. I will present my view of him during this fic.  
  
Oh, another thing. It may take some time before I continue this...  
  
I have so much to work on.  
  
Tiian 


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